Original spillet af Loudon Wainwright III.


 D                   C                    
 There once was a man who just couldn't cry
 G                                    D 
   He hadn't cried for years and for years
                          C     
 Napalmed babies and the movie "Love Story"
 G                                 D 
   For instance could not produce tears 
      A            G                     D   
 As a child he had cried as all children will
              C                        D
 Then at some point his tear ducts ran dry
                      C                   
 He grew to be a man, it all hit the fan
 G                                  D
 Things got bad, but he couldn't cry


D                     C
 His dog was run over, his wife up and left him
G                                       D
  And after that he got sacked from his job
                        C      
 Lost his arm in the war, was laughed at by a whore
G                               D
  Ah, but sill not a sniffle or sob
     A           G                    D
 His novel was refused, his movie was panned
C                                D
 And his big Broadway show was a flob
                         C
 He got sent off to jail;  you guessed it, no bail
    G                           D
 Oh, but still not a dribble or drop


D                      C
 In jail he was beaten, bullied and buggered
G                          D
 And made to make license plates
                C
 Water and bread was all he was fed
G                                  D
 But not once did a tear stain his face
A             G                      D
 Doctors were called in, scientists, too
     C                                 D
 Theologians were last and practically least
                              C
 They all agreed sure enough;  this was sure no cream puff
G                           D
 But in fact an insensitive beast


D                        C
 He was removed from jail and placed in a place
G                           D
 For the insensitive and the insane
                        C
 He played lots of chess and made lots of friends
G                                D
 And he wept every time it would rain
         A            G                        D
 Once it rained forty days and it rained forty nights
        C                                     D
 And he cried and he cried and he cried and he cried
                       C
 On the forty-first day, he passed away
G                       D
 He just dehydrated and died


D                           C
 Well, he went up to heaven, located his dog
G                                  D
 Not only that, but he rejoined his arm
                            C
 Down below, all the critics, they loot it all back
G                               D
 Cancer robbed the whore of her charm
    A                 G                                  D
 His ex-wife died of stretch marks, his ex-employer went broke
  C                                D
 The theologians were finally found out
                         C
 Right down to the ground, that old jail house burned down
  G                          D
 The earth suffered perpetual drought


 D                   C                        G-D   
 There once was a man who just couldn't cry